Monday, November 11, 2013

Day 11: The Engagement Ring

The Husband is many wonderful things, but spontaneous is not one of them.  So when we got engaged we discussed it, and then went to pick out the ring together.  I had wanted silver, but he thought that gold looked better with the diamond, so we went with gold.  I think at the time I just thought it was so funny that he even had an opinion.  He doesn't remember that at all.

We officially got engaged in Hidden Valley, where his parents had a ski home at the time.  We went up for the weekend and it was very low-key.  His parents came up the next day to have dinner and celebrate with us.

These were the things that I was thinking about this morning when I realized that my engagement ring was missing.  So were two other rings- my wedding band and another ring I wear often on my right hand.  I had taken them off last night to do dishes and set them on the kitchen counter.  Which was stupid.  I usually set them up on the windowsill, out of The Girl's reach.  She loves shiny things, which means jewelry.  It means other stuff too- sequins, glitter, etc.  But she loves jewelry and is always asking to wear mine.

I knew right away that she had grabbed the rings and done something with them.  The Husband and I started to go through the house.  I found my wedding band and the other ring pretty quickly, in a magazine basket in the living room.  But my engagement ring was nowhere to be found.

It wrecked my fucking day.  I'm behind on a lot of stuff, and with The Boy at a friend's house all day, and The Girl at school in the morning, I had expected to get a lot done.  I had a very long to-do list.  Instead, The Husband and I were taking the house apart.  We searched through all of the trash cans.  We looked under and behind everything.  We went over the living room with a fine tooth comb.  Nothing.  It was crazy.

The Boy got back later that evening.  We enlisted his help- he's really good at finding stuff- but he didn't turn up anything either.  By the end of the night I was exhausted and resigned to the idea that maybe we would never find it.  'It's somewhere in this house,' The Husband said.  I agreed.  'That means whoever we sell the house to will find it.  It won't be us.'  Ah, that's my natural optimism shining through.  Apparently I give up very easily.

I hate to be so attached to a thing.  I kept telling myself that it was just a ring, I have so much else that matters so much more.  And it's true.  But it's hard to just give up something that you've worn every day for almost seventeen years.  And it's hard not to feel a sentimental attachment to an item like that.  An item given because we love each other very much and wanted to spend our lives together.  Of course the love and the marriage are far more important.  But it's hard not to miss the ring.


  1. Aww... I'm sorry about your engagement ring. :( Hopefully you'll find it one day when you aren't even looking for it.

    1. Thanks so much Mandy! Our son ended up finding it Wednesday night. Honestly, he has the best eyes in the house.